Life can be volatile, and sometimes it’s difficult for students (and ourselves) to combat these challenges. It’s common for students to bring their personal struggles into lessons, so I think it’s important to be a voice of support and stability. As a tutor, you might be the only person a student feels comfortable opening up to, and striking the balance between being supportive and staying professional can be challenging. There a few things we can do to support students in these times:
Recognise Signs of Distress
Students rarely come out and say, “I’m struggling emotionally,” so tutors should be attentive to subtle signs that might indicate distress. This could manifest in frequent cancellations, declining performance, unusually withdrawn behaviour, or open expressions of stress. Recognising these cues early on can help a tutor approach the situation sensitively and offer the appropriate type of support. For example, in a session I had the other day, my usually bubbly student seemed very removed and kept asking to be excused from the table. She eventually started crying when she couldn’t understand something. Seeing these signs, I knew I had to be soft and patient in my teaching approach.
Listen Without Becoming a Counsellor
When a student does choose to share their feelings, the most valuable thing a tutor can do is listen actively. Avoid jumping to solutions or interpreting their struggles, as this can make students feel judged or misunderstood. Instead, give them space to express themselves, showing that their feelings are valid without taking on the role of a counsellor. For example, after this student started crying, I asked her whats troubling her, giving her the space to share as much as she wants. I was not trying to therapise her but offered that perhaps these struggles are compounding and making focusing more difficult. Once she calmed down, we refocused to a more tangible activity / goal.
Refocus on Academic Goals
As important as it is to acknowledge students’ feelings, part of maintaining professionalism is gently guiding the conversation back to the session’s academic purpose. Balancing empathy with academic focus helps create a structure where students feel safe but are encouraged to work through their challenges by engaging in constructive activities. We then went through all her subjects and made a concise list of all the work she has to do, setting achievable small goals that would make starting and finishing tasks easier.
Allegra Pezzullo
