When I meet a new student for the first time, I’m always surprised by how much of the anxiety in the room is actually my own. People often talk about the student’s nerves—those are real, of course—but far less attention is given to the tutor’s quiet fears: Will I meet their expectations? Will I understand their needs quickly enough? Will I connect with them as a person? These uncertainties can sit heavily at the beginning of a session, which is why I’ve learned that easing into things is not just helpful for the student—it’s essential for me.

Starting with casual conversation is one of the most grounding parts of the process. Something simple—asking about their day, their classes, or what led them to seek tutoring—gives me a moment to breathe and get a sense of their personality. It helps bridge that brief but uncomfortable gap where two strangers try to figure out how to work together. As we chat, the fear of the unknown softens, and I remember that tutoring is, at its core, a human interaction long before it becomes an academic one.

Once we’ve warmed up, asking the student what they expect from the session and what kinds of explanations or activities they respond well to gives me a clearer map to follow. Setting my own broad expectations—what I can offer and how I typically structure support—helps stabilise both sides. It turns the session from a vaguely intimidating experience into a shared plan.

I’ve also learned not to dive straight into the material. Taking a few minutes to orient myself—looking over prompts, examples, or problem sets—prevents that messy, disorienting scramble that can heighten my anxiety and undermine my confidence. That small pause makes the work ahead feel manageable, and it allows me to show up as the calm, steady presence the student deserves.

Thea Macarthur-Lassen